Sometimes I can’t sleep. This is one of those times.
I have plenty of work I could be doing while my subconscious is vetoing my decision to rest, but to sit down and work seems like admitting defeat. So, instead, I decided to further dilute the information content of the Internet by going delving into my “to blog about” pile.
A long time ago, in a different place (in so many ways), I started to write a post about the differences and similarities between monogamy and polyamory. It’s probably a good thing that I never finished it, as what I was churning out based on my several months of quadding was definitely pretentious and probably pointless.
Now that I have 7 years of polyamaring under my belt, a three-person mortgage and a baby with an above-average number of adult care-givers in her life, I am an expert on the subject in exactly the same way that nearly 30 years of breathing make me fit to pronounce on the human respiratory system.
Every now and then, documentary makers will get in touch with Dan (and very occasionally with me) and ask to put us on the telly for the normals to goggle at while they eat their chips*. One time we actually spoke to a nice media student who was making a radio programme, but usually we offer to answer any questions whilst refusing to be made an example of.
Here’s the thing. I can’t tell you (or the viewers at home) how polyamory works. All I can say is that it works for me. Want to know if it’s a sustainable lifestyle? Go look at the research. Want to know if it could work for you? The person you’ll need to talk to would be any current partner you might have.
One last thing. On the rare occasions when I have time to think about it, it’s pretty insulting that people want to stick me on TV just because of who I’m dating. TV people, when you ask that you’re being the straight guy going into the gay bar to see how the other half lives. And no-body likes that guy.
* This seemed playful when I wrote it but on a re-read it comes across as insulting. In my defence, I ate a lot of chips when I was monogamous.